I'm not sure if being transparent is good or bad but certainly suffering at times, just like now. I am a person that tell things straight to the point especially to my friends and when I can't I will suffer and keep finding ways to forget bout it. At the end, what the fuck that their live have to do with mine? right? Even as of now, I can see it but I cannot do anything to it and I guess when I speak too much it ppl will hate me for being nosy. Even I don't bless someone who might soon to be as ONE but it's non of my business coz ppl has blossom the chances and soon will give the tix for entrance. Seriously, I did asked myself, what the hell is wrong with me? It's not that I like that guy, why do I care so much? I dunno.... seriously...

What TK said was true, how I do survive in a group which I don't belong at all? Isn't funny? I paused and I thought of it, which is true... but I am happy with those moments but ppl might find I am boring and soon there will be someone appear and I will be fading away... which happening now.... I don't blame but I am sad.... n this disturb me. I don't mean to take things for granted, if I can afford I don't mind paying too.... coz many times I went out with frens I did not pay... not that I don't want but BL will not allow plus their bill.... the total amount cost a month of my expenses. Prob my buddy don't mind, but I think I need to save some dignity for myself.