Now I know.....

I never rejected to anyone help/needs whom I define as "FRIENDS / BUDDY". But it seems that diff people may have diff type of sharing of love. I've not even overcome my trauma and now I am always alone in room! I wanted to share with my frens or at least they r here for me, but no one cares. Some think I will get over it and it's just small small peanuts. Well, not until the needle poke onto ur own skin...the pain is painless! So, they dun prioritize my feelings. I mean, what r frens for? To be sincerely there when he/she needed a fren the most rite! Apparently, no one is with me now...I am alone. Everyone suggest me to have frens for few days to overcome this... but no one is willing to be with me and to overcome my horrible experience!!! And some worried that they might ask for trouble coz dunno the robbers will come back again o not....

I am always there for any of my frens when they needed a fren... but it seems that there is no thing such as kind hearted! I guess is time for me to redefine my terms of calling ppl FRIENDS!

Hey everyone,
This is going to a the worst experience I've ever had this in my life. It started like this....

Ah chi (a guy who rented my room) went to Kepong for a drink with frens at station 1 (1230AM). But his frens din turn up on time, so he went to 7-Elevan (quite a distance) to buy reload card. So the moment he stepped into his car, 2 indian guys came forward and block his door and pointed him with a knife! He was told to give all his belongings....he refused. At the same time, his frens called to inform he arrived, so pressed 'answer' and then he shouted for help and that is when the indians got pissed. They dragged Ah chi to backseat (along 2 indians) and suddenly came up another indian as driver. So total were 4 in car. Ah chi was covered with helmet and his head was pushed down.He can't see anything... while his head was down, he was asked whether he has got money in bank and he replied NO. So, the suspects asked where he lived. He was beaten until he got no choice to tell he lived in OLD TOWN (MY HOUSE!!!!). While they were rounding for 3hours before they came to my house, and in between they actually picked up another 2fellas that took drug in the car. So total now is 5indians and ah chi!

At first, they were reluctant to go in coz there were number of cars in my house. They rounded my house few times and checked who are our family members! Ah chi, was in panicked and he told that the house seperated to 2 floors and as for my floor.... it is only my dad, the only man around with his bro..the rest are females! Now, they know who are there in my house, 4men went into the house and 1in car to take care ah chi! The moment ( my hearts starts to shiver again now...) they came up, they actually tried to open our doors but all locked. Finally he manage to open the last room where ah chi and his bro stays. He pointed the parang at his bro ( AH HONG) and asked him to take off his golds while the rest ransacked his room ( they took PC, PSP, money, ATM,IC)then blindfolded him.

After that, Ah hong heard they walked out... so he thought that they are leaving. A while later, they walked in and unfold his eyes and TOLD HIM TO GO NEXT ROOM TO KNOCK THEIR DOORS!!!!! So Ah hong was so scared but no choice coz the parang was on his neck! Ah hong, went to the door (christine's room and she was not asleep yet) and knocked slowly... so she find it strange and quickly call me, I told her I don't know also. I went to the door, try to listen what sound and even look down through the door hole... I saw shadows only. At that time, my doggie was already alert... he barked!

What pissed me was my mom was so smart that she open her door when she heard some noises!!!!! and when she found there were strangers, she quickly slam the door and lock it!!! During that time, one of the indian did try to hold the door with his parangs BUT failed!! my mom shouted to me asked me not to open the door, and my dad jumped up and shouted for help at the balcony!!! and i also shouted for help.... so dragged ah hong down...ran out the door and then threw him aside!!! they drove off the vios and ah chi was still inside!after 1/2 an hour..they called to ask for ATM pin number. Ah hong told them that he don't have any money in that account. so they instructed him to bank in!!! I did called the police..but they took 20min to arrive coz they were having their SAHUR before fasting!!! The inspector took more than 1/2hour to reach!!! Things and investigation was so bloody slow!!! Police told us to hold their time... while they try to detect...and the end they couldn't help much! coz.... ah hong came up the idea to use FriendFrinder (his ex used to check him with that)..we told the police and they dun even know what the heck is FRIEND FINDER!and asked us how we manage to find it! Then around 7am, we can't wait and we bank in the money... RM1300 coz v negotiated it. They let ah chi go... they left him at the mortuary at jln sg besi... we walked to a man and asked for location details... the man told him and he walked out and took a cab back to his restaurant (he's a chef) and woke up his colleagues that stayed in the hostel...

So, my whole day just running around from JPN, hospital and police station!Ah Chi n Ah Hong can't speak english or little bit of malay... So, I have to be their translator 24/7! Until now...I am still so emo... I dunno how to overcome it! So every time I remember Ah chi told them that our family only few of us and only 1 man, I worried they would come again........

Started 1st day.... in different industry.... so far everything looks good except that I walk more and do more stuffs. colleagues are great, she taught me alot of stuffs although she is only 3months old in that workplace. She brought me to whole building and told me every single procedures and we had lunch together. Lady boss make sure I am taken care of while familiarizing myself to the new environment!! At least I know where I am... what I will be expecting to do... surroundings environment is a bit old but the people are friendly... they won't wait for you to ask but they will approach and say "if you need anything you can ask me.... don't worry bout disturbing although my table a bit messed up" Well, I felt happy and blessed that ppl ere are not self-centered! I am blessed that I have spacious working table too.. well, they r in middle relocating every dept so for time being... me n J r chucked into another level without any supervisory! Owh... we use fingerprints to clock in & out... cool!

well... let's see what's tomorrow... As expected, my responsibility are quite big, cases of complaints are all taken care in a very professional way and I am expected to be tip top for the organization! Workloads .... challenging!!!

Life is so dark n disappointing when "they" do not understand and in fact, giving more stress.... I know it's the culture but I have my own world also... I did struggle to live in other ppl's world and including "you all" but it seems I am not fit... I cried when I tried and things was not appreciated. I just hope ...no more stress and love is all around....

Likewise, when I wanna share some new love around... it seems so hard to feel that would happen coz it takes alot of effort and agreement from some side. Some faces that need to be consider and some stress again I need to walk through... I guess. time is all I need and hope for the best.....

Will update my blog soon...LOL!!!

I was very bz the whole week with seb around. I don't know if I should explain how much effort I've contributed,,,, for a guy who is NOT my someone at the first point. But indirectly I declared too he is someone.... he left ady, and everything is on a distance that may not be any stronger... coz human change gradually... same goes to him... I m really curious if distance relationship is really that tough...

He left ady and now I am on with all my pre planned. stuffs!!! went to support droolotte spinning yday and continue to get crazy with sam... both of us really enjoyed ourselves... too bad... her hubby does have restriction on her...sigh...guess i am lone ranger again!! hmmmm.... it seems like my mind is all bout him,....that's serious man! I nvr have such prob LONG LONG TIME!!!! I guess I am in trouble...oh oh!!!

I tender my resignation...FINALLY!!!! 2months and I could start my new life at somewhere new... I really really pray that this is gonna b a good atart! challenges... hmmmm hmmm...more more more!!! the more the better!!

Dad just whack my doggie until he urinated on the floor! My doggie is jst a MinPin (miniature pinscher). He quietly took a vege from my dad's bowl and my sister shouted very loud to my dad that my doggie took it WITHOUT helping my doggie. I was in the room when incident happened, the moment I heard my sis shouted... I know my doggie is gonna b in trouble!!! Coz my sis tone was more like complaining... I seriously angry and upset that my sister did not think of ways to help but to create more trouble. At the end, my dad whack my doggie terribly and mom argued with dad. It was a chaos...my sis walked to the room n continue her dinner!!! I wish she could have b more mature to think bout other ppl and their feelings too. Because of this argument, I got involved and blamed and adding more stress on top of what I am facing & having now!If my parents really decide to give away this doggie I will leave this house coz my doggie is so innocent, he's jst a dog and he won't know that taking food without permission is wrong and even if he knows he is wrong now doesn't mean he won't repeat the same mistake. I really thought that the best place for me to rest is not a good holiday but a good psychiatric.